Don’t Fall for False-Forgiveness
False forgiveness is an ego epidemic. And I know this first hand as I tried it over and over again only to have suffering appear to increase in my life. When we believe that something unfair – betrayal, pain, illness, lack, etc – is real, and then we attempt to forgive it while we still believe that 1) it was an injustice, and 2) that the cause is in another, the body, the past or the world, then it simply cannot be forgiven.
Once we have made a sin real it becomes literally impossible to forgive it. Punishment must then be exacted whether we’re conscious of it or not. Unfortunately, to the degree we choose to cherish the belief that we were unfairly treated is the extent to which we will unconsciously administer self-punishment. And this is the ego’s prime purpose for the body; to use it as a painful testimony to others’ guilt.
We have made a person, thing or experience a legitimate opponent to God, to Love, and to our one shared and Holy Self. Once we believe this insidious illusion and then attempt to pardon a real transgression, we will unwittingly agree to carry the “effects” of our belief that we were indeed unfairly treated. And that someone is guilty! Pain, illness, conflict, deprivation and death are the most typical signs of this confusion.
In this case authentic healing of the single cause of our physical symptoms cannot be forgiven because it has not been recognized. Before something is genuinely forgiven we must be wholly “willing” to be accountable for and forgive our self for our own trigger. This – and only this – is the source of all healing within and without. NOTE: See the Seven Essential Principles to Quantum Forgiveness here: https://nouksanchez.com/nouks-blog/the-seven-essential-principles-of-quantum-forgiveness/#audio
If we try to forgive someone or something we still believe really did hurt us, we will attempt the absolute impossible. Our hurt and their pardon are mutually exclusive! It’s an impossibility to forgive someone and yet still retain the physical proof (as disease, pain, etc) that their sin is eternal. And this is why, with True forgiveness, with genuine acceptance of the Atonement, all physical effects or consequences of our belief in sin are healed along with their cause (mind).
Remember that the body’s state is a direct “effect” of either our un-forgiveness or our forgiveness. Jesus is insistent that once we have truly accepted the Atonement that the body then cannot suffer. Being completely and divinely repurposed with Spirit, the body attests to forgiveness by exhibiting only loveliness and health. In its healing it is living testimony to our brother’s sinlessness and our own.
Jesus speaks of false forgiveness here (forgiveness to destroy). He makes an exceedingly uncompromising statement, one that appears as brutal toward the ego’s idea of its cause of sickness, pain and death.
I feel these following paragraphs are far too important to gloss over. And that is why I include them in their totality here:
“The unhealed (sickness, pain, accidents, etc) cannot pardon. For they are the witnesses that pardon is unfair. They would retain the consequences (sickness or pain) of the guilt they overlook. Yet no one can forgive a sin that he believes is real. And what has consequences must be real, because what it has done is there to see. Forgiveness is not pity, which but seeks to pardon what it thinks to be the truth. Good cannot [be] returned for evil, for forgiveness does not first establish sin and then forgive it. Who can say and mean, “My brother, you have injured me, and yet, because I am the better of the two, I pardon you my hurt.” His pardon and your hurt cannot exist together. One denies the other and must make it false.” T-27.II.2.
“To witness sin and yet forgive it is a paradox that reason cannot see. For it maintains what has been done to you deserves no pardon. And by giving it, you grant your brother mercy but retain the proof (as pain, illness or adversity) he is not really innocent. The sick remain accusers. They cannot forgive their brothers and themselves as well. For no one in whom true forgiveness rests can suffer. He holds not the proof of sin (broken body) before his brother’s eyes. And thus he must have overlooked it and removed it from his own. Forgiveness cannot be for one and not the other. Who forgives is healed. And in his healing (including the body) lies the proof that he has truly pardoned, and retains no trace of condemnation that he still would hold against himself or any living thing.” T-27.II.3.
Jesus states that no one in whom True forgiveness rests can suffer. In forgiving truly, our body is healed as it is no longer used as proof of sin before our brother’s eyes. The body then is divinely repurposed.
Before I continue with this crucial teaching I feel a burning question arising from some who are reading this: “But what about innocent babies born with deformities or illness? How could they be responsible if they are not even cognizant of choice? And how can they heal?”
“I am responsible for what I see. I choose the feelings I experience, and I decide upon the goal I would achieve. And everything that seems to happen to me I ask for, and receive as I have asked.”T-21.II.2:3-5
Regardless of appearances to the contrary, there are never any victims. We choose all our experiences. The issue is that while our choices are made from the pseudo self (guilt and fear) they will remain largely unconscious because this is what the ego does. They are deliberately unconscious – until we desire to forgive and become conscious – so as to prolong the projection of guilt which feeds the whole illusory time cycle of birth, death and amnesia – as reincarnation.
Individuals are seemingly born into the dream as helpless newborns. Almost every newborn enters with amnesia of their solitary purpose. Within the seemingly endless timeline of reincarnation every individual chooses his experiences according to his level of attraction to guilt as the fear of God/Love/Holy Self.
Forgiveness is always for both people. When we forgive our self for having unknowingly used someone to hurt us, we are healing us both and erasing the painful split in our mind. The more we do this the easier it is to see others with Christ Vision. As our mind becomes unified all minds are affected because we share the one perfect Identity. In the following paragraphs Jesus speaks of the joyous repercussions of wholehearted forgiveness.
“Forgiveness is not real unless it brings a healing to your brother and yourself. You must attest his sins have no effect on you to demonstrate they are not real. How else could he be guiltless?”
“Your function is to show your brother sin can have no cause. How futile must it be to see yourself a picture of the proof (sickness, pain) that what your function (forgiveness) is can never be! The Holy Spirit’s picture changes not the body into something it is not. It only takes away from it (the body) all signs of accusation and of blamefulness (sickness, hurt and pain). Pictured without a purpose, it (the body) is seen as neither sick nor well, nor bad nor good. No grounds are offered that it may be judged in any way at all. It has no life, but neither is it dead. It stands apart from all experience of love or fear.”
“Into this empty space, from which the goal of sin has been removed, is Heaven free to be remembered. Here its peace can come, and perfect healing take the place of death. The body can become a sign of life, a promise of redemption, and a breath of immortality to those grown sick of breathing in the fetid scent of death. Let it (the body) have healing as its purpose. Then will it send forth the message it received, and by its health and loveliness proclaim the truth and value that it represents. Let it (the body) receive the power to represent an endless life, forever unattacked. And to your brother let its message be, “Behold me, brother, at your hand I live.”… “The simple way to let this be achieved is merely this; to let the body have no purpose from the past, when you were sure you knew its purpose was to foster guilt.” T-27.I.4:1-3,9:1-8,10,11:1
The purpose for the body based on the past was to use it as a vehicle to demonstrate separation (pain, disease, death) and prove others guilty. Once we genuinely refuse to do this any longer and we accept the Holy Spirit’s purpose for the body, we use it to demonstrate Love without attack, without judgment, blame or guilt.
Our minds are always joined. And what does this mean? This means I cannot consent to suffer without it also affecting you and vice versa. The good news is if I decide to heal via accepting the Atonement, you are healed along with me. You may not be conscious of this healing however it is a fact.
We are so accustomed to believe that correction involves judgment, blame and punishment. But these are never corrective; they serve to make the illusion of sin and guilt real. True correction transpires only through accepting the Holy Spirit’s undoing of our fearful perception as the Atonement. Therefore, correction is forgiveness. And forgiveness is correction.
The Miracle of Self-Forgiveness
Even with my long study and application of the Course I find it just continues to get deeper and more miraculous. As my trust in Holy Spirit develops, it eclipses familiar fears and gives me the consistent courage to look to the miracle behind appearances of suffering.
As I write this I find myself in yet another deepening of my understanding and practice of the Atonement. Sometimes I am baffled by just how complex we think healing is. Jesus promises that the Atonement heals everything. There is absolutely nothing in the ego’s hierarchy of illusions which cannot be healed fully by the miracle. After all, the first miracle principle is “There is no order of difficulty in miracles.”
“The offer of Atonement is universal. It is equally applicable to all individuals in all circumstances. And in it is the power to heal all individuals of all forms of sickness. Not to believe this is to be unfair to God, and thus unfaithful to Him. A sick person perceives himself as separate from God. Would you see him as separate from you? It is your task to heal the sense of separation that has made him sick. It is your function to recognize for him that what he believes about himself is not the truth. It is your forgiveness that must show him this. Healing is very simple. Atonement is received and offered. Having been received, it must be accepted. It is in the receiving, then, that healing lies. All else must follow from this single purpose.” M-22.6
As Jesus explains, healing is very simple. Yet most of us live as if there is an insurmountable order of difficulty in miracles. When challenged, we immediately judge our self, another, an ailment or situation through a filter of fear based on the past. These fears are then projected onto the situation. In addition to the filter of fear we then add judgment that certain problems are harder or even impossible to heal. From this delusional vantage point, is there any wonder that there is no room for the miracle to enter and prove fear wrong?
Jesus tells us that the only way we can ever heal is to be healed, but we must first show up to initiate it by receiving it. It’s not a doing thing but more a surrender and acceptance of God’s boundless Love and certain healing.
In accepting the Atonement we must remember that God’s Love is all that exists, and we are nothing but this Love. Recall there is no opposite of this Love which ensures our immunity to any threat. This perfect Love has already healed everything we seem to see through the body’s misleading senses.
Love and healing are one. Our belief in fear causes the illusory appearances of fear in our relationships, body and life. Fear or attack itself is the single perpetrator because when we accept it as legitimate we have blocked Love as healing. Yet the moment we intentionally choose instead to enter a most sovereign and Holy Instant in which we literally “will with God” to accept His undoing of what we imagine we see or feel – we completely receive healing of the single cause of our disturbance; whether its effects lie in our body, in another’s body, or in a relationship, etc.
It takes only one Holy Instant. This instant is eternal and not affected by linear time. As such, it’s available in every moment we choose to show up and receive it.
Healing, Love and miracles are one. Where they are received and extended, fear along with its symptoms must vanish. These healings are merely the effects of the absence of fear. The Atonement is a Holy Instant in which we accept and receive the complete eradication of fear. When the cause of suffering is healed via the Atonement so are its effects (physical symptoms) because both cause and effect remain together in our mind.
If we sincerely want to help to heal someone then we accept the Atonement for our self first. Perhaps a simple bank account analogy here may be helpful. Let’s imagine that each time we genuinely accept the Atonement for our self on behalf of another, we deposit that healing into a constantly increasing bank account. That account is inclusive, so it’s available to the whole Sonship the instant they are willing to receive (withdraw the deposit). The specific person we desire to help will use his own free will to choose when they want to withdraw the deposit (miracle) we’ve made on their behalf. In the meantime our deposit continues to bless us and others.
The prerequisite for accepting the Atonement or miracle is a Holy Instant, even just one split second, where we lay fear aside completely and willingly accept God’s Grace as His most Holy restoration of our perception. For one Holy Instant empty of fear, Spirit’s immaculate healing floods in. Where fear is absent, Love is.
“The only thing that is required for a healing is a lack of fear. The fearful are not healed, and cannot heal. This does not mean the conflict must be gone forever from your mind to heal. For if it were, there were no need for healing then. But it does mean, if only for an instant, you love without attack. An instant is sufficient. Miracles wait not on time.” T-27.V.2:8-14
Before we go on let’s look at some of the most typical expressions of fear. Some of these may not be recognized as fear but instead be misinterpreted as Love or caring. For instance, when a loved one is ill, in pain or in distress our initial response is often “concern.” Concern, worry, anxiety and sacrifice are not gestures of Love. They are its opposite, expressions of fear, and their presence blocks the miracle.
This is why when we are tempted by any expression of fear, we need the Atonement. While we’re concerned about someone we are unknowingly reinforcing their fear-driven state of suffering. This is one of the major reasons why Jesus teaches the necessity of undoing specialness in our relationships. This form of relationships promotes fear and sacrifice while using pseudo love as concern.
The false self has no idea what Love is. The only “love” it knows is love with attack, or fearful love. Yet there can be no such thing because Love and fear are mutually exclusive. The presence of one completely negates the other. In other words, they cannot be merged.
There are no degrees of Love. Love is total and indivisible. Fear is also total and contains no degrees. Yet it does not exist. So special love is always “fear” and is therefore the absence of Love. Just take a moment to really feel into this fact.
The Atonement necessitates for us to show up in a Holy Instant of Love –without – attack. Literally this means to come without concern, worry, anxiety or neediness. It’s a Grace-filled moment where we lay all our imagined concerns and needs aside. We don’t ask for anything. Nor do we offer anything. Spirit knows the requests of our heart and has already fulfilled them. In silence, we sit deeply in our heart and receive the Grace of God as divine correction.
Tips on Accessing the Atonement
When we’re in fear it’s often difficult to access a moment of “lack of fear” in order to accept the miracle. For those who have difficulty accessing a genuine “fearless moment” in which to receive the Atonement this may be helpful. The Atonement calls for an instant of “lack of fear.” But, while we feel hopelessly lost emotionally, in any one of the many expressions of fear, it can feel like an impossible task.
One practice when this occurs is to visualize the fearful emotion as a tiny infant who is crying out of intense fear and confusion. I remember that I am not the infant (emotion). However, I choose to bring this baby to my heart and enfold her or him in tender acceptance no matter how distressed this child appears. I see and feel their total innocence. I do not try to fix this infant; instead I quietly become the unopposed Love that holds this precious but distressed child until it has returned to peace in my arms. Then I recognize that all it ever needed was to be accepted fully without judgment.
In this practice we learn how to accept our self as perfectly innocent regardless of any inner turmoil. Self-judgment is fear. Therefore, we must access a moment of complete acceptance of our self.
In this acceptance there is often a felt sense of relief, peace and gratitude. Indeed the gratitude we feel is a sure sign that we did receive the miracle! If we received it and we’ve accepted it on behalf of our self and someone else, then they must receive it too (although they may not be conscious of it yet). It’s impossible not to receive the Atonement without it affecting the one we seek to forgive or heal.
No one can ask another to be healed. However, we can accept the purification of our perception on behalf of someone else. Indeed, we cannot heal someone else if we have not received healing first in order to give it. We cannot give what we do not have. If we’re giving healing then it’s always our own mind that receives correction first otherwise we cannot possibly extend it.
Remember the half of our mind that believes in and therefore values suffering, sickness, conflict, etc is the exact same half-mind that projects suffering in another’s mind. This delusional half-mind that we seem to share is the separation illusion. This split half-mind is not personal and exclusive. It doesn’t belong to just one individual. This fearful half is a shared insanity while we still believe (value) the painful effects that only “it” can project.
To the degree we are concerned or triggered shows us where the source of healing rests; in our own mind. The remedy begins by recognizing that the adversity we seem to witness arises from just one source, our own fear. We cannot believe or perceive attack from the delusional split mind in another unless we first choose to perceive through the same delusional half-mind.
“He overlooks the mind [and] body, seeing only the face of Christ shining in front of him, correcting all mistakes and healing all perception.” M-22.4:5
When we see someone else as separate, through relationship conflict or illness, etc we project this suffering via the unreal half of our mind. If we receive the Atonement – for our self –on behalf of someone else, then we are both healed. Holy Spirit unifies our mind healing the split, and all that remains is one whole mind. We accept our union as one. In this “closing of the gap” healing is free to extend because the two delusional half-minds collapse leaving a Holy Instant of the one unified mind, or the mind of God.
“Correction is the function given both, but neither one alone. And when it is fulfilled as shared, it must correct mistakes in you and him. It cannot leave mistakes in one unhealed and set the other free.” …“In His acceptance of this function lies the means whereby your mind is unified. His single purpose unifies the halves of you that you perceive as separate. And each forgives the other, that he may accept his other half as part of him.” T-27.II.15:1-3,16:5-7
If we were entirely fearless we would see clear through all appearances of disease, conflict and deprivation of any kind. In fact, we would see the perfect face of Christ behind every flimsy veil of suffering. And by seeing only this, we would join with it. Love without fear is restored. And the illusory veil would literally fall away.
A prayer that came to me recently and one which gives me instant peace is this:
“Holy Spirit, I give to you all that never was – in exchange – for what always was and is as God created me. Amen.”
This teaching will be continued in The End of Death, Volume Two. Stay tuned!
Audio version
Please visit our store for more information about my bestselling books, The End of Death (in English, Spanish, German), A Manual for Holy Relationship (in English, Spanish), and others:
Dear Nouk,
Thank you so much for posting this. I love it when someone says what what it says. Thank you for being so to the point and ‘not nice’. You’ve made it so simple and clear. Can’t wait for the next volumes…
With gratitude,
Gerdien
A big thank you Gerdien! I’m so happy you’re taking this path <3
Practical question: how to ask hs to help me to overlook and disbelieving whatever ( betrayel) had upset me in the past?
In one teleclass nouk mentioned saying “hs heal my mind ” like really healing emotions and perceptions from the past. How to induce this healing?
Dear Kiki, here are some links below and a prayer 🙂
PRAYER TO RELEASE SELF BETRAYAL
“I recognize that my own fear of change or loss has tempted me to lie to myself. I am ready to unearth and heal the areas in which I betray myself. I recognize that I have unconsciously projected my self-betrayal onto my body, others or the world. Spirit, please help me to become mindful of when I abandon myself to fear or deprivation; and help me to forgive myself. I ask you to reveal to me and help me release all the areas in which fear has caused me to deny your Love as my Holy Self. Amen.”
How do we unknowingly Betray Our Self?: https://nouksanchez.com/nouks-blog/how-do-we-unknowingly-betray-ourselves/
My Changeless Innocence Prayer: https://nouksanchez.com/nouks-blog/changeless-innocence-prayer/#audio
The 7 Essential Principles of Quantum Forgiveness: https://nouksanchez.com/nouks-blog/the-seven-essential-principles-in-quantum-forgiveness/#audio
Hi again Kiki, are you in our one of our global ONLINE (TTC) Total Transformation Class groups? If not, I strongly encourage you to join one. It is so supportive and loving. You will get a lot from it. Here is the link. Just look for a host that you resonate with: https://nouksanchez.com/ttc-miraclesbootcamp/