From The End of Death, Vol. Two
Copyright 2016 Nouk Sanchez
Listen to the AUDIO VERSION here
I now see that when I listen to the inner critic I am always hearing the ego. But the real question is this: “Do I believe it?” If I believe what it tells me then I will abandon my Holy Self and scurry down the ego’s dark rabbit hole in order to try to fix or improve the ego’s illusory problem. Yet it’s the ego attempting to remedy a false problem. Anything I do that is propelled by fear, guilt or doubt cannot be fixed unless I recognize my only error regardless of the problem; my belief in fear in the first place. Now, I can exchange my fearful perception for the miracle.
The ego’s undivided purpose is to convince us of separation from our Holy Self; therefore its entire survival depends on our belief in guilt and fear. And a chief by-product of this belief is the delusional addiction to (ego) self-improvement. Just look at all the ways we attempt to improve our self.
There is a huge ego payoff in self-improvement attempts and that is guilt. Because when the ego tries to better itself it does so from a sense of deprivation and fear thereby reinforcing guilt each time we appear to fail to reach our self-improvement goal. We unknowingly acquire guilt through multiple failed attempts at self-improvement such as dieting, health control, nutrition, exercise, parenting, saving money, job, image, relationships, etc.
The false self needs guilt, striving, effort and sacrifice to become more and to have more. It does this to keep us so thoroughly distracted that we never realize the Truth; which is that we are already complete, whole and that all our needs are already met. Constant seeking and ego-self improvement act as decoys to divert our attention from the simplicity of resting in receiving the purity and protection of our own divine guiltlessness. It also has the disastrous effect of manifesting many illusory problems that “it” seeks to solve all the while keeping a secret agenda – seek but never find.
How much time and focus is spent on futile attempts at improving and defending our self, our body and our life at the “form and behavioral” level, most of which ends up as fuel for guilt? For instance, how many attempts at improving the body via dieting or exercise have resulted in guilt and self-loathing? These are unconscious attempts at self-attack. On the other hand, how much time and focus is spent on opening our heart to gently and lovingly accept and receive the Love of our Being, as the one beloved and guiltless Child of God?
I’m catching myself now when there is a critical thought or belief. In that instant I see it’s the ego, the voice of guilt and fear. And I am not that. God is not that. There is never any fear, guilt or sacrifice in real Love, in God’s Love. In fact if I feel guilt then I am shutting myself off from God’s Love. And if I experience fear, sacrifice or guilt in a relationship then I believe the ego’s version of “love” which always comes with a cost which I am no longer willing to pay.
A Powerful Healing Mantra
Guilt; it’s an unconscious addiction to preserving the false self-concept, the idea of separation alive. Without it, all that remains is our incorruptible Innocence which is Love and joy without opposite. I was given a powerful but short mantra that if practiced and taken in deeply with Spirit, is totally transformational. It opens the heart and invokes the experience of our divine guiltlessness. Guiltlessness is indestructibility. It becomes the state of fearlessness when embodied. This is the state that Jesus lived in and is why He was able to heal the sick and raise the dead. Every miracle He performed was realized through His embodied state of guiltlessness; His unassailable and divine innocence. And he asks us to do the same.
When we allow this divine suspension of guilt and fear, even if for only a moment, it cracks open our hard shell of resistance to God’s Love. Through the ego, we all cling to a deep sense of worthlessness. And then we use ego distractions such as self-improvement which increase guilt, to alleviate the pain of feeling less than worthy. Yet this vicious cycle acts as a defense to receiving the very Love that we so deeply yearn for. This little mantra is one I use whenever the ego tempts me to guilt, self-blame or self-doubt:
“I AM the incorruptible Innocence of God and nothing BUT the incorruptible Innocence of God.”
There are two essential parts to this mantra. The first is a statement of inclusion which declares that, “I AM the incorruptible innocence of God.” But without the second part of this sentence the ego is apt to hijack it.
It’s happy for me to be incorruptible innocence yet it tries to convince me that I am sometimes something else as well (guilty, wrong, worthless, frail, etc.). Therefore, the second part of this mantra is an outright assertion of my Value in God’s eyes. It is a statement of exclusion because it has no opposite just like God. When felt with conviction as Truth in the heart, this acts as a magnetic invitation for God’s immediate entry into our awareness. So that last part declares, “…and (I AM) nothing BUT the incorruptible Innocence of God.”
Now, our heart’s awareness is open to receive God’s Loving knowledge of our uninterrupted Identity as Love itself. Now, we have a taste of “what” we really are and therefore, what we are really worth. As a result we open to the exquisite joy, health and abundance which are our birthright as an immaculate Child of God.
I have found this mantra works best if I set a genuine, heartfelt intent to join with Holy Spirit first. The intent is to ask:
“Holy Spirit, in my fear, doubt and self-blame, I have forgotten who I AM. And I invite you in to give me the EXPERIENCE of what I AM. My heart is wide-open to receive this experience. I gladly give to you everything that blocks my awareness of the Love you have for me; the Love that I AM.”
And when tempted to judge another, here is the perfect antidote to be said quietly to the other in our mind:
“You are the incorruptible Innocence of God and nothing BUT the incorruptible Innocence of God, and as I see you I see my Self.”
Lastly, the answer to the question, “Which self needs improvement and self-esteem?” has become glaringly obvious. Here is a helpful passage from Jesus asking us to give him both our body and ego rather than continue our futile attempts to improve these illusions:
“I can be entrusted with your body and your ego only because this enables you not to be concerned with them, and lets me teach you their unimportance. I could not understand their importance to you if I had not once been tempted to believe in them myself. Let us undertake to learn this lesson together so we can be free of them together. I need devoted teachers who share my aim of healing the mind. Spirit is far beyond the need of your protection or mine. Remember this:
In this world you need not have tribulation because I have overcome the world. That is why you should be of good cheer.” T-4.I.13:4-11