If we truly wish to help ourselves or another to heal from emotional or physical sickness, then it’s wise to look more carefully at our intent. The ego seeks to cure through fear, so as the underlying cause of all sickness (guilt), is never found and addressed. If we have un-relinquished fear beneath our intent to heal, then we’ll inadvertently increase fear in ourselves and/or the one we’re attempting to help.
When we are suffering or sick, it’s because we unknowingly believe that it will bring us something that we want. That’s the unseen ego playing its role. So if someone is in pain or sick and we want to help them, we can’t truly help them until we examine our own motive first. Are we fearful? Because if we are, then we need to acknowledge our fear, without self-judgment, and take an instant to suspend the fear and ask for Atonement instead. It only takes an instant to suspend our fear, inviting the miracle to take over. Remember that Spirit cannot take away our fear. Fear is a choice we make and our ego ‘will’ cannot be over-ridden by God. We must be disciplined to suspend fear to allow Love and Right-Mindedness to take over.
“The presence of fear is a sure sign that you are trusting in your own strength.” W-48.3.
Also, fear proves that we believe the threat is real. Once we believe the threat is real, we cannot forgive it. Forgiveness can only take place when we willingly recognize that fear is an inappropriate response. We choose to remember that only God’s Love is real. We remember that this ‘appearance’ of sickness must be just that; an appearance other than God’s Love, and therefore unreal. This acknowledgement opens the mind and heart to forgiveness and miracles.
A sick person does not usually recognize the ego’s underlying desire for pain or sickness. The sickness could mask an unknown ego sabotage. And in some cases, if we try to help someone who believes unconsciously that they need their sickness, then we may cause ourselves and the one we attempt to help, unnecessary suffering. For example, my mother was in physical pain for most of her life. I tried desperately at times to help her find and release the cause of her misery. But I was met with fierce resistance so many times that I gave up in the end. Her resistance and anger made me resentful.
What I didn’t know back then was that her ego clung to sickness and pain as her identity. And through trying to help her find and undo the cause of her suffering, I was threatening her perceived identity. No wonder she was so resistant. Due to my own ignorance about true healing, I unknowingly caused separation between us instead of joining. And joining is where all healing lies. Much later, after examining the deeper intent beneath my desire to help my mother, I found that it was from fear and guilt. Anything we do from this intent will produce separation instead of joining and healing.
Miraculous Healing only Takes One
When we desire to help heal another, we must look at our deeper intent. As difficult as it is to grasp, there is always only one to heal…and that’s our self. So in my mother’s case, I could have been instrumental in her healing and mine, if I had just become more mindful in watching my own reactions to her pain and physical deterioration. The real healing for both of us lay in recognizing my own pain and fear; along with my own concerns, as they revealed to me how much I still feared to trust in God’s Love. This fear is the unconscious guilt that drives all adversity in our lives. And when we get an opportunity to see it and relinquish it (forgive), it is an incredible blessing all round.
During that time of doubt, I was certainly not demonstrating trust in my mother, my Self or in God. And this is what needed to be seen (with Spirit) without judgment, and surrendered in exchange for the Atonement.
Here is a miraculous prayer for healing that was given to me by Spirit, “Holy Spirit, please help me to forgive myself for having unknowingly used______(the appearance of pain or sickness in myself or another)_____to attack myself and to separate from Your Love, as my Holy Self.”
There are never any problems. Only the temporary absence of Love’s presence in my awareness. Love’s presence in the form of a miracle, is invoked the instant I remember, “Regardless of the appearance of chaos, I am wholly perfect and innocent, therefore I share in God’s Strength, safety and invulnerability. I call on these to help me look past (forgive) all ego appearances. I trust and accept that only Your Will is done.” This…is accepting the Atonement which is the healing of unconscious guilt.
We can help heal another without saying a word to them. True joining and healing occur when we refuse to believe what the ego-body senses tells us is real. Sure, magical medical remedies might still be administered however true healing of the fundamental cause of all suffering is gently taking place, as we quietly place our trust in the miracle.
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Hello dear Nouk,
I just wanted to comment on what you wrote ‘When we are suffering or sick, itβs because we unknowingly believe that it will bring us something that we want’. I am so grateful to have had a miracle of healing today and wanted to share it with you. Physical pain seems to have been a big part of the identity I made up and believed was me. I have observed how when I am in pain I feel very separate from the Love of God and everyone and everything. Today I was looking at this very deeply with the Holy Spirit and surrendering it all into his hands. I saw that I had such a deeply held fear of being rejected by God that I was actually using pain as a defense against being rejected by God. It’s a bit hard to explain the healing but I was shown that the ego had me convinced that as long as I held onto ‘pain’ I could save myself from opening myself up to God’s Love only to find that God would indeed reject me. As long as I had pain I could keep myself safe from the horrific fact that God does not Love me and has rejected me. I love the part in the course where it says something like ‘defenses that no longer work are automatically discarded’. So now I have the opportunity to surrender this belief in being rejected by God and I am so so very grateful. I can see this pattern in my life and how I projected this fear of being rejected by God onto eveyone and everything.
I Love you Nouk, thanks for your devotion to Truth.
Love Linda
Linda, thanks so much for sharing this deeply healing insight that you have had. As you heal, we all heal with you. Now you have exposed the ego sabotage, watch for the miraculous domino-effect it initiates. When you get a chance, plse read the section in ACIM text: The Obstacles to Peace, Ch:19. Section IV.
Here is a snippet from Jesus in the Course that is helpful too:
“You [are] as God created you, and so is every living thing you look upon, regardless of the images you see. What you behold as sickness and as pain, as weakness and as suffering and loss, is but temptation to perceive yourself defenseless and in hell. Yield not to this, and you will see all pain, in every form, wherever it occurs, but disappear as mists before the sun. A miracle has come to heal God’s Son, and close the door upon his dreams of weakness, opening the way to his salvation and release. T-31.VIII.6:1-4.
Would love to see you at one of our Retreats too one day…
With much Love,
Nouk
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